Tuesday, July 28, 2009

It's almost that time again!

Here at the King household we're gearing up for school to start again. Didn't we just get out a little bit ago? It sure seems like summer has just flown by! Livvy goes back Aug. 11th (it seems like it just keeps getting earlier every year) and my classes start back Aug. 24th. It's hard to believe that Liv is going into the 5th grade. Seems like only yesterday I was holding her hand all the way to the 1st grade classroom and praying I wouldn't cry until I was back to the car.

Yesterday we were at Walmart so we got most of her school supplies. Every year I am irritated that I am told to buy Kleenexes and dry erase markers. (I don't even own a dry erase board!). Yet, every year I give in and buy them anyway. I don't hold it against the teachers. I know many of them spend hundreds of their own dollars getting ready for school. I just find it ridiculous that the schools have decided to replace chalkboards with dry erase boards and then not furnish the teachers with dry erase markers. I don't ever remember having to carry chalk to school for my teachers. Toby says it's because all us parents give in and buy those items that the school can continue to ask us for more and more. However, I know how the kids who don't bring these items in are often belittled and badgered (this I DO blame the teachers for) so I just can't bring myself to put Liv in that position. AND...I truly don't mind helping out her classroom. I just prefer to do it because I want to and not because I'm being made to.

I had to laugh yesterday as Liv read over the required list of school supplies. This year the teachers have asked that the kids not have mechanical pencils or large binders and they have required them to have the plain folders with fasteners down the center. All of which were not requirements last year. Livvy looked at the list and then said, "WHAT?!?!?! There is no reason for this other than they just want to show that they have the control over us. They're taking away all our rights!!" It was all I could do not to laugh outloud. Boy, does she have a lot to learn about the real world.

I'm anxious for my own classes to start back up. The first week is always total chaos, but after I get going I usually enjoy my classes. This semester I am taking an anatomy class in person. It will only be my 2nd face-to-face class. My business degree I completed totally online except for one speech class. I'm not big on face-to-face classes mainly because I love the convenience of the online classes. BUT, I was afraid that anatomy was just one of those classes you are better off experiencing rather than reading about. I'm taking it as an accelerated 8 week course so we'll see how it goes. Beginning Aug. 29th, I'll be spending 8 Sat. in a row immersed in anatomy. I'm also taking a History class, Algebra, Biology and Medical Terminology class this coming semester. My last semester nearly bored me to death so I'm hoping this one is more interesting. At some point in the 6-8 weeks I need to go take the TEAS test (a nursing school entrance exam). I have to score high on it to have any chance at getting in to Ivy Tech's nursing program. I get 3 tries so I need to get going on my first attempt sometime soon.

We're finally getting settled in our new house. Got the problems with pool fixed and have finally had a few days warm enough we could enjoy it. Next weekend we're planning a big yard sale. Hopefully it doesn't rain on us. I don't think I've ever had a yard sale that it didn't rain at least once during the sale. Maybe this is the year...

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Am I the only one?

Toby and I were discussing this today and wondering if we're the only ones who feel like this:

When you have several days, weeks, months (if anyone gets as far as a month let me know - haha) when everything seems to be going good, do you start to get nervous as to when the next bad thing is going to happen?

I'm not a pessimistic person. I use to be, but I gave it up in exchange for optimism which comes with less stress and more tranquility several years ago. However, when things are going good for us and nothing major, life-altering and/or bad happens for a few weeks I start getting antsy. It's kind of like when you know someone's going to jump out and scare you but when they do, you still scream. I know something less than ideal will come along, but I'm anxious and nervous as I wait for it to happen. When it does, I'll still be shocked like I wasn't even expecting it. Crazy, I know.

In the past few years, we've certainly had our share of "bad" things, but things seem to be really looking promising for the first time in years. Although I should be really excited and happy that our lives are pretty calm and uneventful right now, I find myself worrying about stupid little things and important big ones...yet all things I can't control. Why do I do this? Am I the only one who obsesses over tranquility this way?!?

Perhaps this is because Toby & I both are planners. We have to have a plan for everything and we like to know where we'll be in 6 months time. However, we all know that life just doesn't work that way. I know it's best to live one day at a time, but I find myself worrying about next year...OK so I'm a worry-wart (would you believe me if I said I'm actually less of a worrier than I use to be).

Part of the negativity is due to all the negativity we are surrounded with. From the "sky is falling" mentality of the media to the loss of jobs and illnesses I see in the small community all around me. Sometimes it's hard to stay positive in a negative world.

I'm trying hard to focus just on the here and now. I'm constantly reminded that life is short and precious and that we should live each day to the fullest and not worry about what we don't yet have (the gift of tomorrow). I know if one door closes or an obstacle presents itself, we'll still be OK - another door will open or an answer will be given to us.

So, am I the only one? If not, how do you maintain a positive outlook? When you feel consumed with worry and totally out of control of anything, how do you re-focus? How much worry is good and how much is bad? Where's the line between being completely irresponsible and living life in a way that you enjoy each day to it's fullest and yet are prepared for tomorrow if it gets here?

Sunday, July 19, 2009

A Heart Divided...

The past 2 weeks we've been busy moving into our new home. We really do love it here and the more settled we get the more I find things about the house that I just can't believe I use to live without (like the dishwasher...whoever invented this wonderful little appliance has become one of my favorite people:). While we still have many boxes to unpack and tons of yard sale stuff to go through and price for the upcoming sale, our house is starting to look like a home.

Unfortunately, the last 2 weeks have also been full of sad events. When news reached us about a young boy in our community being lost to a raging river during a family vacation, my heart broke as I thought about his parents and long-time girlfriend and all the others who knew and loved him. I didn't know Jared personally, but as a parent, I can't imagine what his family and loved ones have been through. Today, we heard the news that his body has been recovered. Obviously not the outcome that several days ago everyone hoped to hear, but at least his family may be able to have some closure. Still, it seems so very sad to lose such a promising young man.

While I was praying for Jared and his loved ones and working to put our house together, news came that a dear cousin had miscarried her first baby. I knew from other communications with her how much she & her husband loved and wanted this baby. I also knew from the get-go that her pregnancy would be high risk, but I had prayed and hoped that God would bless her with the angel she so greatly deserved and desired. However, it just wasn't meant to be right now. Again, my heart broke for her and her husband. It seems so senseless to me. I guess I will never understand why good people who would make great parents can try and try to have a family only to be struck with one obstacle after another while other people who aren't fit to parent a dog can multiple like a rabbit! It seems so unfair. And I know life isn't fair, but I just don't get it. Why does God allow godless people continue to bring these tiny little souls into the world while His own people grieve over their inability to conceive or the loss of the child(ren) they do have? Guess that's one of those questions that I'll never know the answer to.

Tonight, my heart is joyful over my own family's circumstances and hopeful for some of our future plans, but it is also heavy with heartache for the Hammack/Springer families and for my dear, dear cousins. I continue to pray that they are given peace and comfort in their time of sorrow...